Saturday, July 01, 2006

A Dose from the Reverend



He sure could yell.
We're gonna miss him.



Chicks Dig Jerks - Bill Hicks

Hitler had Ava Braun, Manson had Squeaky Frawn,
Ted Bundy got lots of dates, I wonder what I'm doing wrong.
I don't pretend to understand women's little quirks
Just one thing I know for sure - chicks dig jerks.

Well, if I meet one more single mom Whose true love is up and gone
Tells me on her trailer porch 'Bout that man Still carries a torch,
Sure, he came home drunk each night Beat the kids and her in a fight,
But, man, she loves him so, It's so hard to let him go.
Well, I don't pretend to understand women's little quirks,
Just one thing I know for sure - chicks dig jerks.

Well, I'm sure there's some out there who can relate,
Particularly young men without a date
See some jerk, some fine, fine babe, Go driving away.
Well, is that a new bruise you got on you?
What does it say, that he loves you?
Sure he beats you, but afterwards he cries, "Oh, baby, I could die."
Honey, I don't think that's nothing to be proud of,
I think it's called alcoholism
I don't think you should move away,
Stay with him till you're in your grave.

"You're so sweet."

"Can't we just be friends?"

"I think of you as a brother."

Ouch. Ouch. You're hurting me.

What do I have to offer you, baby? Poetry and true love.
That's not enough, I know for sure,
You need someone to throw you through the door.
Well, I don't pretend to understand women's little quirks.
Just one thing I know for sure-chicks dig jerks!
Chicks dig jerks, it's so true.

Tell you, man, be mean to 'em man, they'll never leave you, then,
'Cause chicks dig jerks. Just ignore 'em. Act like they're not there.
Man, you're gonna be pulling chicks out of your hair. They love that.
Act like you don't care, Look at them everywhere, they come running.
Tired of being a good guy Such a lonely life.
I'm gonna be a jerk Yeah, that's right, I'm gonna step on lots of toes.
Girls gonna go crazy for that kind of guy.
Baby, I'm gonna act like I don't know you.
Not gonna return one of your calls.
I hear her. She’s already at the door man.
She’s ‘intrigued by my indifference’.
Yeah, I'm a jerk And it's working out.

5 Comments:

Blogger SkinFluteSymphony said...

Truer words never spoken. An old friend of mine that I saw recently, great looking girl, has a decent job, can hold a conversation, great rack, pretty much the package...goes out with possibly the biggest bong smoking loser I've ever had the misfortune of meeting.

Does he beat her up? Yes.
Does he have a job?? No.
Am I jealous as all hell??? Yes. *cries*

8:31 PM  
Blogger I Am Man I Am You. said...

That is genuinely depressing Skinflute.

9:06 PM  
Blogger SkinFluteSymphony said...

that is the downward spiral that is my life I am afraid!

12:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bill Hicks. Bah.

(I had to type in Word Verification to say that?)

7:21 PM  
Blogger I Am Man I Am You. said...

Blasphemer!!

11:07 PM  

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